When we first entered the program many of us felt like our eyes had opened for the first time in a long time. We began to see how so many of our past behaviors had been wrong or harmful. We also began to be honest about our own character defects. These facts were very helpful in our recovery. As our minds cleared we began to see some glaring defects of character in people both within and outside the program. This one was too prideful, that one was in denial and a third was totally lost in being a victim. These facts were so obvious to us that we immediately wanted to share our insights with these and other people.
Experience has shown us that to do so would be a mistake. One of the major tenets of 12 step program is one of personal reflection and self discovery. Most people will not be open to those insights that we wanted to share. There is a good chance that they will immediately become defensive and even angry about our so called insights. If we have to the ability to think back to when we were in denial about our drug and alcohol usage or about our character defects; we will immediately comprehend why we should remain quiet. What we can do now is pray for them.
Personal Reflection: Do I give people the space to recover at their own pace?